Sunday, September 18, 2016

Box of Demon Children

It's been a common practice in my household to create film boxes, a collection of films based on similar themes that are chosen in random grab-bag order, as a way to watch some of the great films we have stored up without spending an hour choosing one.

So yesterday, my older kid was acting like a bat out of hell-no listening, ineffective timeouts, banshee-level screaming, the works. It made me want to run away into my hidey-hole. Here's a list of excellent films about demon children, if you're so inclined to craziness. And yes, Rosemary's Baby IS absent, because if you watch closely, there's no baby in that film--that should be a requisite.

In no particular order...

Image result for the omenThe Omen - all three of them. Originals only, and no crap-ass fourth film that makes no friggin sense. The ultimate demon child. And, with Gregory Peck and Sam Neil, how could you go wrong? The first is actually one of my favorite films of all time--the thing I will never flip the channel away from.

Silent Hill - for video game enthusiasts and horror fans alike. When you turn the corner, and Pyramid Head is ripping the skin off of someone--now that, my friends, is ART. Click here to see this bad boy in action.

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Image result for spliceSplice - Rule number one for being a good parent: Don't genetically alter your kids.  Rule number two: Don't try to kill them.  Rule number three: Don't fuck them. Ever.

Ils - Just being on this list might be giving away too much, but if you're looking for something with atmosphere, THIS is it.

Village of the Damned - not as popular as Children of the Corn, but definitely the superior one.
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The Believers - If you're in the mood for a voodoo film, here's something bursting with tension.

Orphan - "I'll cut your little dick off before you even know what it's for." Ultimately quotable.

Pet Sematary  "Sometimes, dead is better." Even more quotable, and absolutely perfect. Two perfectly stupid parents get what's coming to them.

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"I want to play with youuuu"


  1. I still can't watch Pet Sematary. It's freaky and I even get a little nervous when watching that kid on Full House. CREEEEEPY

    1. Oh but it's so gooood. That little kid does a heck of a job! I think the rickety sister is actually one of the creepiest makeups ever.